Something strange happened a few weeks ago. Every Sunday, my husband and I
listen to a sermon together online, sort of as 'extra food' for us.
Usually, we listen to a sermon from our family of churches in England,
my home church or our sending church. This particular week we listened to a
couple from our sending church. It was a good sermon, but I'm not going
to talk about that. What really caught me off guard was the feeling of
homesickness I felt after listening to that sermon.
Homesickness? Where in the world did that come from? I've lived in England for
over a year and a half and have not really struggled with homesickness. Until now.
I
could speculate why I'm experiencing it now. Maybe it's because my life
has changed dramatically in the past 4 months. Maybe it's because we
now have a baby, and I long to be around family so our son can grow up
with his grandparents, cousins, aunts and uncles. Maybe it's because my parents and in-laws have both come and gone recently. I really don't know, but all of a sudden I had this wave of missing the US.
How do I deal with homesickness?
Maybe I haven't experienced it since moving to England because I've been intentional in trying to
not
to be homesick. I've learned a few things about preventing it since
moving here as well as from when I was in college. There is, however,
something about moving to a foreign country that trumps going away to
college in terms of being homesick.
Keep busy.
I had to
get involved in things right away. It really helped me to have things to
look forward to every week. That could have been working at the church
office, meeting ladies for coffee, bringing my husband lunch, or
whatever other event that would come up. I found that if I didn't have
something to look forward to, it was probably going to be a rough week!
Find a place that reminds you of home.
This was a tip that a friend
of mine gave me a few months after moving to England. She told me that
sometimes it helps if you can find a place that reminds you of home,
like getting coffee at Starbucks or lunch at Subway. For me, it was
grocery shopping at Aldi. :)
Find 'family.'
Honestly,
it helps a lot that I'm married to Leon, who's lived in England longer
than myself. He and Asher are my family now. At the same time, it's
helpful to find a family we can be a part of. For example, it will be
nice for Asher to have a 'substitute' granny, aunt, uncle, etc. when
his real grandparents can't come visit (or we can't go visit them).
Thank God for Skype!
Modern
technology has come a long way. Now we have the ability to see our
friends and family back home on Skype video. It helped Leon and I as
we grew our relationship early on,
and it helps us now as we keep in touch with family and friends back
home. My favourite part about Skype right now is introducing Asher to my
friends and
family
by way of video (although it hasn't happened that often). I think my
parents are glad they can watch Asher grow up through such an amazing
technological invention.
Enjoy a cup of tea.
You know I have to
say this since we live in England. :) There's just something about a cup of
tea that makes my troubles seem to go away. And I can have my cup of
tea while doing my next tip.
Look to God.
In
reality, this should have been first on my list. As a Christian I
should look to God in struggles such as homesickness. He will give me
strength. It also helps to keep an eternal perspective—This earth isn't
my home, and I'm longing for my home in heaven with Jesus.
So
those are some things that I've found help me deal with homesickness
while living in England. Have you struggled with homesickness? What have
you done to deal with it? How do you help your children deal with homesickness?
I've struggled at times with homesickness. The past few times we've returned from the US, we were leaving from where my parents live, and I spend some time feeling blue because I missed them so much! This happens even when we visit them in the states, or if they visit us, and we're just states away instead of an ocean.
ReplyDeleteI agree that staying busy helps. Having team members take care of meals and getting to spend some time with them helps. After a little while the homesick feeling subsides, even though I still miss the people back home.
I'm very thankful for Skype and Facebook, to keep in touch with family and friends back home!
I'm struggling with homesickness lately, which I'm told is quite normal for the 1year mark. I do feel thankful for facebook and skype, and it is good to sit and grieve for home, for a moment.
ReplyDeleteI just wrote some thoughts on what homesickness does for a missionary... stripping us back and making us feel broken.
Also some thoughts on how it refines us as messengers - to be homesick for heaven.
http://underthebigtopp.wordpress.com/2013/09/02/homesick-missionary/