Three months AND three days AND counting...

...with both a sense of anticipation, nervousness and,

depending on the day,

either a little bit or a lotta bit of dread!

We've accomplished a lot since Christmas (in no particular order):

• Home assignment housing secured?     ✔
• Plane tickets purchased?     ✔
• Hotel reservations made?       ✔
• Travel vehicles, where required, rented     ✔
• Furlough vehicle purchased?     □
• Sell list/spread sheet made?     ✔
• 3 major recording studio projects?     1.5 ✔
• Plan for the studio while we are gone?     □
• Homes found for our pets (43 goats, 54 pigeons, 3 cats, 2 dogs)?     □    
• luggage that could be sent on ahead?     ✔
• Final packing lists?     ✔
• Brendan's senior pictures?     ✔
• College paperwork completed?     □
• Scholarship paperwork completed?     □
• Drivers' licenses renewed?     ✔
• Family vacation scheduled?     ✔
• Family vacation planned?     □
• House repairs and walls painted?     □
• Sell vehicle 1?     ✔
• Sell vehicle 2?     □
• Home school curriculum sorted, stored or delivered?     ✔
• Educational options/possibilities for our 8 children explored... discussed... evaluated... decided?     □
• Schedule meetings with home/sending church     □
• Schedule meetings with financial and prayer partners     □

In some senses, though? Those are all the easy things. They take time, but they are all relatively concrete and tangible. They can be put on a list and checked off as they are completed... and completion is usually pretty cut and dried. Either it is done or it isn't.

What about the intangibles that we have on our list?

Photo by Jessica Neff

Of course, many of those "intangibles" have to do with people - colleagues, friends, neighbors... all those dear folks we've come to love over the past years, those people who've become our family when we weren't near to our blood families.

Photo by Christine Banke

Whether or not there is the intention to return after a time of home assignment, preparing to leave well and recognizing that there is no guarantee for what the Lord might bring into our lives underscores the importance of ending well each term we spend in this expat world. Those preparations will inevitably include asking some probing, uncomfortable or even downright hard questions: 

• "What has/have been the high point/s of this term?"
• “What were some of the most difficult experiences?”
• "Where do I feel I've succeeded?"
• "How do I feel I have failed? Is this failure due to sin?"
• “How have I spied God working in my life personally, professionally and spiritually?”
• “What did I hope to achieve - long term goals and short term objectives?" 
• "Did I accomplish them, have I not yet achieved them, or are they currently in progress?”
• “The activities I have been involved with during this term - would I describe them as satisfying or fulfilling?  Are they consistent with my reasons for becoming a missionary in this particular place? Am I doing what I told our partners back in my home country I'd be doing? Do my activities apply to my specific responsibilities?"
• “What did/is God accomplish/ing through me?"
• “What have been the greatest roadblocks and frustrations I have encountered?"
• “Are there unresolved on-field relationships (expat and local colleagues) I need to reconcile before leaving?”
• "What goodbyes need to be said, how do they need to be said and what memories do I hope to make in the time remaining? How do I say goodbye well?"
• "What will I miss most when I am not here? How can I treasure that unique aspect of my life in these final times?" 
• "How do I help my children to ask, work through and answer all of these same types of questions?"

Photo by Sally Manhard 

What intangibles and questions to ask would be top of the list for you and your family... if you were leaving for home assignment this summer?

*********************************************

Other posts in this series of preparing to leave the field:

In which I'm charged by a hippo...
Jumping the Gun? Or Procrastination?
Turning over that TCK leaf

Rambling thoughts

I'm stepping away from what I had planned to write. Hopefully you'll be able to follow my rambles. There have been a lot of emotions swirling around in my heart and mind lately, and I would like to try to get some of them out. Recently, in something that I wrote here, I mentioned that it's been five years since we were kicked out of our beloved Russia. The end of those five years--my official term of "exile"--is probably what has stirred up my emotions. That, and we're trying to move again now.

So, recently I took a look at our blogroll. (Have you added your own blog there yet?) That led me to Early Morning Missionary. (So nice to "meet" you Casey!) From there, I ended up on this post and discovered a whole world of missions blogging that I hadn't seen before. (I did see some familiar faces from here, though.)

But back to "this post," as I call it....
The questions asked there have been ringing in my head all week. This statement, too:

"If you follow and obey God, it will always work out for God. There’s no promise about it working out for you."

I have the exact same response that she did: "Sigh."

Here we are. Trying as hard as we can to follow. And yet it feels like we've been wandering in the wilderness for 5 years. Our time here hasn't been wasted; I won't go so far as to say that. But it has just been hard and has often seemed pointless. So--strangely--what I quoted above has been a real encouragement to me in what I have been wresting with. As I ask God why He has had us here, what we have been supposed to be doing, if we missed His direction, and so on, I think I have finally found the answer. And it's a strange one: I may never know! How is that an answer? What feels like an answer is the assurance that it is working out for God.

It is also working out for good. I have been able to cling to "All things work together for good," but it has been so hard to understand the how and why. I guess what is just sinking in now is that this is good. It may not look good to me, but I can't see the whole picture. It is working out for God's glory, and I will trust. His glory is also ultimately for my good. That is what is promised.

To the quote above, I think I have to add a little bit: If you follow and obey God, it will always work out for God. There’s no promise about it working out for you in this life. Then I can agree with it.

What about you? Do you agree? Does obedience necessarily mean a thriving ministry and rewards in this life? I would also love to hear you explain it another way, if you disagree.

* ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~

And a little bonus--a poem from the Daily Strength for Daily Needs that I am coming to love so much: 

"All is of God that is, and is to be;

And God is good."

Let this suffice us still,

Resting in childlike trust upon His will,

Who moves to His great ends, unthwarted by the ill.

J. G. WHITTIER.

Our Children's Ministry

I've just returned from a ladies conference... more specifically, a missionary ladies retreat, hosted by the gals of Titus Women.  For about 40 hours, they shared their hearts with us, encouraged us, spent time listening to us.  They came armed with goodie bags, books, and snacks to spoil us a bit, and were ready and waiting to to have those important chats we women crave--those that end in solid advice and a good prayer.  It was a time of refreshing that we all needed and enjoyed.

One of the things that touched me most was that a mom on the ministry team brought her sweet daughter along.  She was only 11 years old and many would have said she'd be in the way or it might not be the place for her, but that young girl ministered to us all through her servanthood. She was gofer for those of us with full hands.  She rocked sleepy babies and entertained bored toddlers so moms could hear the Word.  She stood right up there in the middle of the other 4 ladies on the team, singing her heart out in praise and worship.  She prayed for us and had mature, meaningful conversations over meals.  I don't know who was more proud of her--her mom or all of us ladies in the crowd, identifying with what it's like to involve our children in the work of the Lord.

I thought of all the times I've had the privilege to see my children involved in kingdom work.  Sometimes it's been the natural sort of ministry that comes from reaching out to a neighbor.  Sometimes it's that "shoved on them" kind like having to sing a solo as part of our missions presentation in churches.  And other times it's purposeful and planned, taking advantage of the gifts we see developing in them.  What a joy it is to watch them mature in the Lord and see Him use them in His service!

In what ways are your children involved in your family's ministry?  In what way are they involved in their own?

Tuesday Topic: Furlough housing

Ashley asks: Do you have any tips for finding furlough housing in the US? Our family is outgrowing the option of staying with family and it is always challenging to find house-sitting options, especially for the entire time that we're back in the States. Are there websites or any centralized spots that you know of that list missionary housing in various parts of the country? Any there other ways to go about finding housing when none of your sending churches have missionary housing? How long in advance do you usually start looking for such arrangements?

(If you have a “Tuesday Topic” question, please email it to me at fylliska@gmail.com. Provide your blog address if you would like to be linked to, or specify if you would like to remain anonymous. Thanks!)

5 Tips for Using MailChimp as Missionaries

With all of the discussion about MailChimp on Christie's post a few weeks back, I thought it would be helpful to share some tips I've picked up on how to use MailChimp as a missionary.

MailChimp is a tool that's typically used for email marketing, but a number of missionaries have started using it. It's an excellent tool, but it's helpful to know how to use it well. Using MailChimp is free for up to 2,000 subscribers and 12,000 emails each month.

1. Let your supporters, friends and family sign up for your updates and manage their contact info themselves. We're busy. Giving your readers the option to sign up and update their information saves you time from having to go through your database and update contact information from time to time. MailChimp even gives your readers a non-confrontational way to unsubscribe themselves from your emails.

2. Use a few links to external sites (aka your blog). Admit it: we love to talk about what we do, and when it comes to writing our updates that can make them really long. If you have a blog, link some of your update-related posts to your update! It will save your breath since you've talked about it already, and those interested can click through to read more. MailChimp also lets you see how many clicks a certain link has gotten and who has clicked it. This is a great way to find out what your readers are interested in!

3. Make use of MailChimp's merge tags. Merge tags can make your updates more personal. We've found that we generally get a better response from our updates when we start them with "Dear Sally" rather than just jumping in to an update. We've found that it increases the likelihood of someone writing you back. But watch out...  you should then write them back! ;)

You can also use an archive merge tags to exclude certain info from web versions of your ministry updates. One thing about MailChimp is that your updates will get published on the web somewhere. So what if you have sensitive information that can't be shared on the web, but can be shared in an email? You can use merge tags for that, too! Used the right way, the archive merge tags can hide (or show) info that will be in an email but not on the archived web version of your email. You can also use the archive merge tags to hide your contact address (that's required by MailChimp on emails) from the web archive (where it is not required.)

MailChimp has a list of a number of their merge tags on their website. Not certain  how to use merge tags? Check out this document on how to use them!

4. Use lots of photos. I'm certain that photos are of no shortage in your updates, but this tip might be something different that you can do. When I'm setting up my family's updates, I include a few pictures from the month. I then link them to our Flickr account so that our readers can see a larger version of the photo, as well as a caption. Again, this can save time and space in your updates if you're keeping your Flickr account up to date! If they follow the link we also can see what most interests our readers.

5. Share your updates on Facebook or Twitter. A lot of the younger generation (does that include me?) is more interested in using social media instead of email to communicate. It's becoming easier (even normal) to build relationships with the younger generation through social media such as Facebook. Therefore it's easier to get them interested in missions and your ministry. Do this by posting your ministry updates to Facebook or Twitter.

In our last update, we made the announcement that we're expecting a new baby.* I have MailChimp set up so that it will automatically post our updates to Facebook when they're sent out. Not that we're out to get responses from people, but we got more responses from friends and family seeing our update on Facebook than we did through sending our email out! The conclusion I've drawn from that, is that more people read our updates through Facebook than through our emails that we send out (at least this time anyway)!

So there you have it! Some tips for using MailChimp. If you're new to using MailChimp, there are plenty of resources out there on how to get started. There are training videos or if you prefer to read, there's also a helpful document.

As I sat down to write this post, I discovered I had too many tips for one post, so I'm planning on writing another post with a few more tips. I also want to hear your tips! If I collect enough from you, I'll compile them in another post, too. :)

Do you use MailChimp? How do you use it? What tips do you have? Please share in the comments!

*Since writing this post, things have changed on the baby front. Please read this post if you like.

Just A Cupbearer

Have you ever heard news that broke your heart? Have you ever become aware of a need so great that it turned your stomach and you knew that you had to act? Have you ever grieved for a nation, or cried out to God for a city?

That is what Nehemiah did. He was a man living far from the home of his ancestors, the city of Jerusalem. He knew God, he loved God, and he grieved for God’s people. In the first chapter of Nehemiah we read that he hears about Jerusalem, he hears news that he can’t believe…that Jerusalem is in disgrace, and the city is broken down and falling apart.

His heart breaks, his knees buckle, and he falls to the ground and weeps. The despair weighs so heavily on Nehemiah’s shoulders that he fasts, cries out to God, and mourns for days. He feels the weight of Jerusalem, the burden of suffering crushes him until he can only remain in prayer, face down, desperately seeking God.

I can imagine how he felt…in ministry we feel it, don’t we? The weight of our cities, our countries, our callings pressing us down, facedown into the dirt, overwhelmed with grief for the pain we see around us. We weep for the youth in our nations, the lost, the seeking, and the destitute. We feel overwhelmed; we struggle to move into action, sometimes paralyzed by the need.

That place was the beginning of Nehemiah’s incredible ministry…a place of prayer, of confession, of crying out to God. He rose from his knees, and moved into action. He went on to restore a broken city, and to persevere through situations and circumstances of incredible pain and difficulty.

The first chapter in Nehemiah tells us that before all of that, he was just the king’s cupbearer. He wasn’t a great leader, or priest. He was the king’s cupbearer. Reading through that chapter, this caught my attention. He was an ordinary person, with an ordinary job who was so weighed down by Jerusalem’s plight that he made that city’s burden his burden, and he dedicated his resources and his life to serving there.

This gives me hope because I am “just” a small person, just a mom, just a woman living far from home with a burden for the city where I serve. I feel inadequate, I make mistakes, and I am always learning. I feel like I never quite have it together.  Sometimes I feel like I’m stuck on my knees, paralyzed, not knowing what to do. But God calls me, enables me, encourages me, and burdens me with the things that break His heart.

I find myself on my knees again waiting for the next step, feeling weighed down, but relying on Him and knowing that no matter who or what else I may be, I am “just” a follower of God whom He can use to bring restoration to the broken places of this world.

Do you ever find yourself in that place of being overwhelmed? What kinds of feelings hold you back from moving forward? How has God spoken to you there?

Becoming a Learner

Our oldest child is turning five this Sunday.  It's hard to believe, and, as I've been anticipating this milestone lately, I've been thinking about how when he was a newborn, I was pretty sure I'd have this whole mothering thing pretty well figured out after five years.  Not so!  His birthday also reminds me of our upcoming anniversary of five years of living on the mission field (he was 3 months old when we moved to Costa Rica).  And, again, I find myself surprised, remembering that as a new missionary, I would have thought I'd be speaking the language better and be adapted more completely to the culture after five years.  I still have so very much to learn!  As I struggled through some of these thoughts lately, God encouraged me by reminding me of a lesson He has been teaching me throughout our time living here.  He reminded me that by becoming a lifelong learner, I open myself to building relationships and becoming an insider in this foreign culture we have made our home.

We arrive in our host countries and we are outsiders.  We have so many dreams and ideas of how God will use us, of how He will bless the people we have come to serve.  We probably come hoping to teach and to lead.  I have learned that if we approach those roles while remaining outsiders, the relationships won't be as deep or effective, and we may come across as if we think ourselves superior.  But, what if we approach these relationships as learners?  I strongly believe that becoming a learner within our host countries moves us towards being an insider.  It shows that we value the culture and that we desire to assimilate and adapt, to understand it and to live as part of it rather than staying in the outskirts.  People love to teach, to share their knowledge, and to be the expert on a topic.  When we allow ourselves to learn from other people, we show a humility and hunger for others' knowledge that opens many doors to stronger relationships.  Because of this, I think I have a stronger desire now to be a learner than I did when we arrived five years ago.

What are a few ways we can become learners as we serve as missionaries in another culture?

• language - Our efforts to speak the heart language of the people we are reaching out to speaks volumes.  Finding local friends who would be willing to practice with you and correct your mistakes is such a great way not only to improve your language skills, but to have an open door to an ongoing personal relationship with them. 
• cooking - This is fun!  When we first moved here, I didn't have a clue how to cook traditional tico (Costa Rican) food.  I asked a neighbor if she would be willing to give me weekly cooking lessons.  We started with basics like seasoned black beans and rice, tortillas and empanadas, and then moved to more specific dishes.  Not only was I learning some really valuable lessons on cooking economically using the most common ingredients here, but I was building a relationship with this sweet neighbor.  In exchange for her cooking lessons, we did an hour of English conversation together every week.  Now, when I try a new dish that I don't know how to prepare, I ask a friend if she could teach me how to make it.  My Costa Rican friends love teaching me their traditional recipes!
• daily life - Do you need someone to tell you the best place to buy something?  Do you need help figuring out how to fix a problem in your house or how to choose the best fresh produce at the market?  It might be easier to ask an experienced missionary, but what opportunities might arise from asking a local friend or neighbor instead?  You could even ask them to come along with you and teach you as you shop in a new place or navigate a medical issue at the hospital.  Asking for help opens doors to relationships.
• new skills - This is something that I have been thinking about lately.  I would love to learn how to sew better.  My next door neighbor is a really good seamstress.  Why not ask her to teach me to sew?  I would want to pay her or exchange the lessons for something else (maybe English classes?).  She is someone who has recently been on my heart a lot.  Maybe this would be a way to open a door to deeper friendship.  Maybe you could find someone who could teach you an instrument or painting or...? 

There are so many more ways that we can remain a constant learner in our host culture.  I would love to hear your thoughts and experiences on being a lifelong learner as a missionary!

What other ideas do you have for ways that you could build relationships in your host country by becoming a learner? In what ways are you currently a learner?  Has becoming a learner opened up relationships that you would not have otherwise had?