You're not Asking for Yourself

We had been married for only a few weeks when we found ourselves sitting with the pastor of our sending church. He asked us what our ministry will look like now that I was a part of it. Then he asked how our support raising was going. I was new to missions and raising support, so it was a struggle for me. I explained that it was hard to ask for support because it felt selfish. What Pastor said in response helped change my attitude and gave me more confidence.

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You're not asking for yourself.

What? But we're asking for people to support us by giving us any spare change they have so that we can do what God has called us to do. How is that not selfish? Well, it's not selfish. The truth is we ask for support because God wants us to serve in our respective host countries and we want our family and friends to come along side us as a part of our ministry. We're giving them the opportunity to serve God with us. By asking our family and friends for support, we're inviting them to join us in our ministry as we take the good news of Jesus to the places where they cannot go. They can help advance the Gospel, and you're the one who is giving them the opportunity!

So, is raising support easier when you remember that you're not asking for yourself? No, not really. The different perspective helps, but it's still not easy. Now to keep this in mind the next time we find ourselves sitting with potential supporters...

When We Need a Reminder Why We're Here

Sometimes we need to be reminded why we're here. Why are we living cross-culturally? Why did we choose to leave our lives of comfort to serve the Lord in another country? Why did we choose to be missionaries?

The other day, we had a delivery man at our door. While I was receiving this delivery, he tried to make conversation with us. He made a comment about our son's accent sounding like the local accent, which led to him questioning me why my husband and I would choose to live here if we're both American. It seemed this man couldn't get his mind around why we'd choose to work for our organisation here, when we could give our children a "better life" in America.

I'll be honest—I struggled not to get angry with this delivery man after he left. He genuinely didn't understand why we'd come to this part of the world to work for a charity.

But that's just it. Our jobs as missionaries don't make sense to the rest of the world. Serving God is foolish to them. And that's why we're here: To serve the Lord and bring the Gospel to those who need it. We're lights shining in the darkness. We should use situations like this to shine even brighter for the Lord.

Sisters, don't let yourself grow weary as you're doing the Lord's work. We shine in the darkness. We'll see the fruit of our work in God's time. Even when people question our choices.

For the word of the cross is folly to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God. 1 Corinthians 1:18 

And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up. So then, as we have opportunity, let us do good to everyone, and especially to those who are of the household of faith. Galatians 6:9-10

The Value of Church Family

We've been busy with family visiting us for the last 2 months. After the birth of our second baby at the beginning of April, my mom and mother-in-law have now come for lovely visits with us. They are now back in the US, and we're missing having them around to help around the house and enjoy life together. It's nice to have them around to celebrate things like the birth of a baby, but living so far away makes it a challenge to have them around to help when we need it. Living abroad and serving the Lord outside our home country has its sacrifices.

My husband and I are discovering that's where our church family comes in. We've connected with our church family a lot in the last year. My husband and I lead a small group at our church. It's part of our job to grow the community in our little group, but it also benefits us since we don't have family near by. With the Lord's help, we're working to build the community in our small group by doing things like opening our home and reaching out to those who have a need.

A few weeks ago, my husband had a shed that needed staining. So we invited our life group to help us. And while we were at it we had a barbecue! It was great to spend time with those in our small group outside of our usual Sunday and Wednesday meetings. One great thing about our weekend barbecue was it enabled a family with small children to come who normally can't attend during the week!

Here are 3 things I've found to help build community where we live.

Serve each other. Help with redecorating, provide a meal, help them move house. When we had our baby in April, our friends provided us with meals so I didn't have to cook!

Worship together. This might go without saying in a small group, but it's important to come before the the throne of our God—together. The best place for this is in our Wednesday night meetings at our home.

Pray for one another. Again, it probably seems obvious, but it's so important. We pass around text messages among those in our small group and church when there's a need. It is great to see God move when the Body of Christ is united in prayer!

There are other ways to build community, but these are just a few that have helped us in the past year.

How do you build community where you live?

Wading Through Our Trials

"We're going on a bear hunt, we're going to catch a big one.

What a beautiful day! We're not scared.

Uh-uh, a river! A deep cold river.

We can't go over it, we can't go under it,

Oh, no! We've got to go through it!"

These words have become all too familiar as I read my son's favourite book to him. Every. Single. Day. Do you know the story? Children go on a hunt to find a bear, but they face various obstacles that they can't master unless they go through them. The book was a Christmas gift for my son, and I can't tell you how many times I've read the story since then.

But having to face those obstacles in We're Going on a Bear Hunt is a bit like our real lives.

We face trials in our lives. When we come upon a trial, we're faced with a decision to make. We can't avoid the trial, so our options are to stop moving forward or go through the trial.

It's scary to go through a trial even when God is right there by our sides. It's kind of like a river in our story—deep and cold. We don't really know what to expect when we step into that river. It might be deep and cold. The current might sweep us away, yet we forge ahead, trusting God will walk with us to the other side.

We don't know what kind of pain we'll need to deal with as we stare our trials in the face. We don't know what losses we may face. We don't even know how long we may be in the midst of the trial. But we do know God will use the trial for His glory and our good.

Wading through the rivers of our trials may be difficult, but there are things we can do to make it easier.

Seek to be secure in your walk with the Lord.

Beloved, do not be surprised at the fiery trial when it comes upon you to test you, as though something strange were happening to you. But rejoice insofar as you share Christ’s sufferings, that you may also rejoice and be glad when his glory is revealed. 1 Peter 4:12-13, ESV

Give thanks. Daily.

Yes, I know it's incredibly difficult in the midst of a trial, but we need to give thanks in all our circumstances.

 ...give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you. 1 Thessalonians 5:18, ESV

Remember that Jesus has "been there" and can understand your sufferings. 

For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathise with our weaknesses, but one who in every respect has been tempted as we are, yet without sin. Hebrews 4:15, ESV

When we step into that river by faith, we will eventually get to the other side. It's then we've discovered how much we've grown because of the trial that God has walked us through.

The Courage to Move Forward

As I think about this beginning of 2014, I find myself setting goals again. And then I realised something startling. I tend to have the same goals every year. I start out with the best intentions, but I never seem to meet all my goals.

We do it every year, don’t we? We set new goals and reevaluate our life's direction. How many of our goals change and how many remain the same year after year? Why do we have to keep setting the same goals, and what keeps us from changing?

It's a battle with our flesh.

We're born with this sin-nature that causes us to keep going against our pursuit of the holy. The enemy doesn't want us to change, to become more godly. He works against all the things that God wants us to be and do. And when we fail to meet a certain goal, he makes us feel bad for it. At least that's how I feel about it.

We can also be tempted to look back too much.

My almost two-year old son recently learned how to walk backwards a few weeks ago. Now he likes to walk around backward really fast. The problem with this is that he doesn't always watch where he's going and has to turn around to gain his bearings on where he's going again.

We can do the same thing when we're too retrospective. We get so busy looking back that life takes us by surprise, and it takes us awhile to figure out where we're going again. It's great to reflect on how God has worked in our lives, especially if we're going through a particularly trying time. It's even better to look forward because too much looking back can distract us from the ways God wants us move forward and grow.

In setting my goals this year, I've been asking myself: Where does God want me, and how does He want me to align my heart with His?

We're now a week into 2014. Let's look forward to what the Lord has in store for us!

What keeps you from meeting your goals and/or resolutions?

Letting the Body of Christ Do Its Job

As missionaries, we have a lot to do in terms of our ministries and caring for those around us (families, as well as friends and neighbours). We are the body of Christ to them. But sometimes life takes us by surprise and we have to let the body of Christ care for us.

When we had a miscarriage earlier this year, I was astounded by all the help we received from our church and organisation. It was a blessing to get a couple of meals provided. We had many offers to babysit our son while I was in hospital. So many people offered their help, and we didn't know what to do with it all.

My husband wanted to make certain to take up every offer of help. I thought we didn't necessarily need the help, though. I felt bad—like we were using them. And besides, how were we going to have all these people help us when we didn't necessarily need all the help?

As a friend of ours was giving us a lift to hospital the week I miscarried, either my husband or I made the comment that we didn't know what to do with all the offers of help, and that we felt guilty for taking it. Our friend kindly reminded us that this is an opportunity to let the body of Christ do it's job. Let them serve—we may not need it, but they do.

This has been one of God's blessings in the midst of our loss: We could allow the body of Christ do what they're called to do. We let them come alongside us and meet our needs. We let them take us to and from hospital, bring us meals, sit with me in hospital, babysit, and keep me company at home. Never in my life have I imagined experiencing the body of Christ from this perspective! It's humbling.

The body of Christ has done its job well.

Because of this, I've been given a new perspective on the body of Christ. As far as I can remember I've always been on the giving end of it... not the receiving end. It's very humbling. I find myself challenged to give more, especially out of the grief that we're experiencing.

In all things I have shown you that by working hard in this way we must help the weak and remember the words of the Lord Jesus, how he himself said, ‘It is more blessed to give than to receive.’ Acts 20:35 (ESV)

Are you walking through a season of trials right now? Let me encourage you to seek encouragement and help from your church, friends and family. If you're not in a season of trials, how can you be the body of Christ to someone near you?

(A version of this post was originally published here.)

On Finishing Well

Over the summer my family traveled back to the US for home assignment. As most of you missionary moms know, home assignment (furlough, or whatever else you call it!) is never easy, especially with little ones. You may find yourselves always on the go, re-teaching your kids every time you travel what they can and can't touch in the places you're staying, meeting people all the time... I guess I don't need to describe it to you. :)

As with most things in life, we tend to start our home assignments strong. We may not be thrilled about the road ahead, but we do our best to do a good job and glorify God while doing it. We were only on home assignment for 2 months (9 weeks to be exact), but by the end of our trip, I was ready to check out and go home! This introvert had seen my share of friends and family members. I was tired and
wanting longing for our own space again.

So naturally, I wanted to check out.

But God doesn't want us to do that. He wants us to finish our race well. Whether we're finishing our time on home assignment or finishing our time on the field, he wants us to glorify him and finish well.

Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one receives the prize? So run that you may obtain it. Every athlete exercises self-control in all things. They do it to receive a perishable wreath, but we an imperishable. So I do not run aimlessly; I do not box as one beating the air. But I discipline my body and keep it under control, lest after preaching to others I myself should be disqualified. 1 Corinthians 9:24-27 (ESV)

Finishing well isn't always easy. We're tired. We want to go home. I found that God gives us strength to finish if we ask him. It's easier said than done, but trusting in God through those last couple of weeks and days can make all the difference. It just takes a few days of constantly coming before him, seeking his grace and strength.

So dear friend, "May you be strengthened with all power, according to his glorious might, for all endurance and patience with joy..." (Colossians 1:11) and may you finish well!

How have you found strength in God to finish well?

5 More Tips for Using MailChimp as Missionaries

MailChimp is a great tool we as missionaries can use to send out our ministry updates. We just have to understand a little more how it works.

Last month, I gave you 5 tips for using MailChimp to send out your ministry update emails. To be honest, I had a hard time narrowing them down to just those five. So here's 5 more!

1. Update your contact list. Last month I discussed how MailChimp allows your supporters to subscribe and unsubscribe from your list. They can also update their contact details. This can be helpful for you since it's all done in MailChimp. You can then take that information and import it into your address book or other contact management program (such as TntMPD). It saves you the effort of having to go through your contacts to update every so often.

2. Segment your list to send emails to certain groups of people. My husband and I have a prayer team who receives special prayer emails more regularly than our ministry updates. MailChimp makes it easy to send emails to just those people by allowing you to segment your list. You can also send emails to specific people if you're going to be in a particular state in the US while you're on home assignment/furlough.

2. Do a little research before you meet with supporters. One of the things MailChimp does is keep track of who opens your emails (based on who viewed the photos in their email program). We may not want to admit it, but let's face it: As much as we would like to think they do, some of our dearly loved friends don't read our emails. So before we meet with a friend or supporter, we like to check MailChimp to see if that person has been reading our updates or not, and whether or not they are subscribed. It may sound sneaky, but it helps us to know what we should be talking about in our meetings.

4. Connect MailChimp with your blog. If you have a blog, you can add a sign-up form. You can then point people who aren't receiving your updates to sign up via your blog! You can visit my blog if you'd like to see an example of how the sign-up form is used.

You can also display a list of past ministry updates for people to read. Some people who may not be familiar with your ministry may like to go back and read past updates. As well, supporters who missed past updates can access them as well. Again, please feel free to check out how we've used it on my blog. (I promise this isn't a plug for my blog!!)

MailChimp has codes available to put these things on your blog.

5. Keep track of bounced emails. You know, those one or two emails that come back to you right after you hit "send?" Then you sit there wondering whether you should unsubscribe that person or contact them to see if they still want to receive your emails. MailChimp makes managing those bounced emails a little easier. Whenever an email bounces, MailChimp will decide whether to unsubscribe that recipient or not.

There are two types of "bounces" that they use to determine whether a recipient should be unsubscribed: soft and hard. Soft bounces are emails that get returned for no reason or the recipient's inbox is full. These might get sent again. Hard bounces usually mean that the email address is no longer valid or the email server flat-out refused the email. My husband and I use this information to decide if we need to contact a given supporter to see if they still want to receive our emails. It's a good way to reestablish a relationship with that person, especially if you haven't heard from them in awhile!

Hopefully you find some good ideas for how you can use MailChimp for your own ministry updates. If you need more help, there are plenty of resources available from MailChimp.

How have you found MailChimp helpful? Let's chat in the comments!

Also, if you have any questions, please leave a comment as well. I'm more than happy to try and answer some of your questions. If you'd rather contact me by email, you can do that chrysti (at) heddingsomewhere (dot) org.

5 Tips for Using MailChimp as Missionaries

With all of the discussion about MailChimp on Christie's post a few weeks back, I thought it would be helpful to share some tips I've picked up on how to use MailChimp as a missionary.

MailChimp is a tool that's typically used for email marketing, but a number of missionaries have started using it. It's an excellent tool, but it's helpful to know how to use it well. Using MailChimp is free for up to 2,000 subscribers and 12,000 emails each month.

1. Let your supporters, friends and family sign up for your updates and manage their contact info themselves. We're busy. Giving your readers the option to sign up and update their information saves you time from having to go through your database and update contact information from time to time. MailChimp even gives your readers a non-confrontational way to unsubscribe themselves from your emails.

2. Use a few links to external sites (aka your blog). Admit it: we love to talk about what we do, and when it comes to writing our updates that can make them really long. If you have a blog, link some of your update-related posts to your update! It will save your breath since you've talked about it already, and those interested can click through to read more. MailChimp also lets you see how many clicks a certain link has gotten and who has clicked it. This is a great way to find out what your readers are interested in!

3. Make use of MailChimp's merge tags. Merge tags can make your updates more personal. We've found that we generally get a better response from our updates when we start them with "Dear Sally" rather than just jumping in to an update. We've found that it increases the likelihood of someone writing you back. But watch out...  you should then write them back! ;)

You can also use an archive merge tags to exclude certain info from web versions of your ministry updates. One thing about MailChimp is that your updates will get published on the web somewhere. So what if you have sensitive information that can't be shared on the web, but can be shared in an email? You can use merge tags for that, too! Used the right way, the archive merge tags can hide (or show) info that will be in an email but not on the archived web version of your email. You can also use the archive merge tags to hide your contact address (that's required by MailChimp on emails) from the web archive (where it is not required.)

MailChimp has a list of a number of their merge tags on their website. Not certain  how to use merge tags? Check out this document on how to use them!

4. Use lots of photos. I'm certain that photos are of no shortage in your updates, but this tip might be something different that you can do. When I'm setting up my family's updates, I include a few pictures from the month. I then link them to our Flickr account so that our readers can see a larger version of the photo, as well as a caption. Again, this can save time and space in your updates if you're keeping your Flickr account up to date! If they follow the link we also can see what most interests our readers.

5. Share your updates on Facebook or Twitter. A lot of the younger generation (does that include me?) is more interested in using social media instead of email to communicate. It's becoming easier (even normal) to build relationships with the younger generation through social media such as Facebook. Therefore it's easier to get them interested in missions and your ministry. Do this by posting your ministry updates to Facebook or Twitter.

In our last update, we made the announcement that we're expecting a new baby.* I have MailChimp set up so that it will automatically post our updates to Facebook when they're sent out. Not that we're out to get responses from people, but we got more responses from friends and family seeing our update on Facebook than we did through sending our email out! The conclusion I've drawn from that, is that more people read our updates through Facebook than through our emails that we send out (at least this time anyway)!

So there you have it! Some tips for using MailChimp. If you're new to using MailChimp, there are plenty of resources out there on how to get started. There are training videos or if you prefer to read, there's also a helpful document.

As I sat down to write this post, I discovered I had too many tips for one post, so I'm planning on writing another post with a few more tips. I also want to hear your tips! If I collect enough from you, I'll compile them in another post, too. :)

Do you use MailChimp? How do you use it? What tips do you have? Please share in the comments!

*Since writing this post, things have changed on the baby front. Please read this post if you like.

Obtaining Passports

We're preparing to go on home assignment this spring. In the midst of setting up meetings already and contacting people (to let them know we'll be in the US), we have other things that need to be attended to before we leave.

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One of those things is making certain all our passports are up to date. We just recently sent off for my husband's and son's British passports. I've learned that it is incredibly difficult challenging to get a passport photo of a very active 10 month-old boy. After several days, we finally got one. If he wasn't wiggling or looking away, there were shadows. Or he had a look on his face like he was filling in his nappy. At last we finally got a good photo because I got the brilliant idea to use the flash on my camera!

This of course got me thinking on all the passport and visa stories that I'm certain many of you have. It's good to remember them and give God the glory for providing in each of those situations. Here are some of our passport stories.

• My husband obtained his visa for India the day before he was supposed to leave.
• Just 2 or 3 months after I moved to England with my husband, I was granted permanent residence, something that takes most people 5-6 years to get. My husband now has British citizenship!
• Because of our visa status when our son was born, he has dual citizenship. We don't have to worry about a visa for him!
• I was issued the wrong visa and got it corrected hours before leaving for the UK.

What are some of your passport stories? We're missionaries... I know we have them! Please share in the comments!

Coping with Reverse Culture Shock

So you've moved yourself and your entire family to a new country. You've lived there for two years, changing and adapting to the culture. You think you've adjusted to the culture shock. Now you find you and your family back in your home country on furlough. After a few days there, you may have realised that things in your home country don't feel like they did when you left. You may have expected it to be normal, but normal has been replaced by your life in the country you now serve in.
You might experience reverse culture shock when you return to your home country.

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This was something that surprised me when I went back to the US for the first time after moving to England. The first big shock was how big the grocery stores were—going to Meijer after 2 days of being back in the US was a bad idea. People were also more friendly than those who live in our part of England. We would go to someone's home for dinner, and be disappointed when we didn't get offer a cup of tea afterwards. When we went to church, complete strangers gave us... wait for it... HUGS!

Through all the differences, I learned to cope with reverse culture shock and temporarily adjust to life back in our home country.

Here are some tips to help you and your family cope with reverse culture shock when you return to your home country:

Acknowledge that the culture shock is there, and expect that things are going to be different. Things in the US have changed. I have changed through living in my host country. Expect others to find that you're different, too.

Find a place that reminds you of your host culture. This might be a pub, coffee shop or a park. It'll be different for everyone. It could even be a place in your mind or having a cup of tea in a corner of a room wherever you might be staying.

Talk to someone who has recently been in your home country to find out what has changed since you were last there. If you haven't been back to your home country in a long time, you might want to talk to someone who has recently been there to find out what and how much has changed. Are there new things happening at church? New cultural norms?

Spend time with someone who understands what you're going through. When my husband and I were last in the US, we found great encouragement talking with some good friends of mine. The husband was an expatriate from Albania and the wife grew up as a missionary kid. Both of them understood what it was like to not really fit in the culture they were in, and that was comforting to us.

Whatever you do to cope with reverse culture shock, remember to run to our Saviour first. After all, he left his home to join us on earth. He probably understands what we're going through, right? :)

How do you cope with reverse culture shock?

Everyday Gratitude

Thanksgiving is in 3 weeks (to me, that's unbelievable!). This time of the year always brings about reflection and thoughts of gratitude for Americans.

But why do we seem to only give thanks around the time of Thanksgiving?

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Thanksgiving is definitely a time of remembering what God has done. I want to challenge myself and you to do this all year round. It's so easy to complain when things don't go my way and not have a thankful attitude. Michele at Passionate Homemaking says this about being thankful:

"It’s the intentional, everyday thankfulness that I seek to cultivate in my...[heart]; illuminating the awe of everyday blessings amid both trials and goodness."

Now there's a challenge... being thankful in the midst of a trial. It's not necessarily about giving thanks for only the goodness; it's about being thankful even when things aren't going the way you thought they should go. What blessings do you find in the midst of the trial?
I can think of two specific trials that I'm thankful for this past year. The complications I faced after the birth of our son weren't expected. Recovery was difficult, but I'm thankful for a good labour and a healthy baby boy!

The other one is more recent with obtaining my driving licence in the UK. It's been a long frustrating process involving many test failures. In the end, I'm thankful that I'll be a better driver because of it and for the huge lesson in humility!

"I give thanks to you, O Lord my God, with my whole heart,
and I will glorify your name forever." Psalm 86:12 (ESV)

So what about you? What are you thankful for today?

Do You Need a Reset Button?

The other day, I had a bad day. I don't have them very often... but this particular day was bad. Nothing was going the way I wanted it, and my attitude reflected it. I was taking it out on my son and hubby. It wasn't pretty. I remembered the song, "Bad Day" that was popular a few years back.

Image Credit: Steve Snodgrass

I just wanted to wallow in the fact that I was having a bad day.

I even talked about it on Facebook when I mentioned I needed a reset button on the day so that I could do things over again and not have such a bad day.

A reset button. That's a good idea.

A friend then reminded me that God allows us to take our failures of the day, lay them at the cross and take the grace that God freely offers us to continue.

Image Credit: Phil Whitehouse

What a good reminder!! I obviously needed an attitude change.

Whenever a bad day strikes, remember that God gives us grace to get through because of Jesus' work on the cross. His grace is the only reset button we need! His grace will carry us through until the next day when we can experience his brand new mercies.

The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases;
    his mercies never come to an end;
they are new every morning;
    great is your faithfulness.
“The Lord is my portion,” says my soul,
    “therefore I will hope in him.”
Lamentations 3:22-24

How have you been experiencing God's grace lately?

When You Serve in a Support Role—Part 2

"Going into missions" had always been at the back of my mind throughout my university days and beyond. It started when a lady I'd met in chapel (who works for a missions organisation in the US) heard I was studying to be a teacher and suggested I teach on the field. Hmm, now there was an idea.

So I did what every missions-minded uni student did and went to Urbana. But I never went anywhere because God's timing is different from mine.

When I graduated from uni, God landed me at a missions-minded church near my home town. I still imagined that one day God would send me off to teach missionary kids somewhere.

Fast forward 4 years to when I met my husband who is—yup, a missionary in England (missionary dating anyone??). :)

To make a long story short, I'm now serving with my husband in England. But I'm not teaching missionary kids like I thought I would be. We serve in a different role from some missionaries. We serve in a support role. In a previous post, I wrote about serving in a support role as a wife and mother. My husband's and my role in our organisation is more or less behind the scenes, with my husband working in IT and myself writing Sunday School materials... but how is that being a missionary?

In the beginning days, I had a difficult time believing that what we do for our organisation is worthy of being supported by our friends and families. After all, we sit at a desk doing IT work or writing Sunday School materials... how is that "missions?"

Leon teaches an IT course so that others can do the IT stuff for their own fields

Think about it: Paul and Barnabas probably had support from their sending church. Without that support, Paul and Barnabas wouldn't be able to do their work as effectively. We work at the international headquarters, where a lot of services are provided for fields around the world. These services enable the rest of the missionaries to advance the Gospel! With the way people use modern technology, if people like my husband weren't working to better the IT systems and keep them running, ministry would probably not be as effective. Doing children's work would also be a lot more challenging without the people who write the materials.

We like have to have fun every once in a while (even if it's playing geeky vintage video games). :)

We're all a part of the Body of Christ (1 Corinthians 12:12-14). We can all have different roles within the Body. Some of us are going to be better at teaching, preaching, etc, while others of us are going to be better at serving behind the scenes (Ephesians 4:11). This realisation has given me great freedom because I'm better at serving in the background rather than up front where everyone can see me.

"Now you are the body of Christ and individually members of it. And God has appointed in the church first apostles, second prophets, third teachers, then miracles, then gifts of healing, helping, administrating, and various kinds of tongues. Are all apostles? Are all prophets? Are all teachers? Do all work miracles? Do all possess gifts of healing? Do all speak with tongues? Do all interpret? But earnestly desire the higher gifts."
1 Corinthians 12:27-31 (ESV)

Don't you just love how diverse the body of Christ is? Your role is important no matter how you serve! Now let's discuss. How do you serve in your ministry?

When You Serve in a Support Role—Part 1

Every time I start a new job, it takes me awhile to grow into my role. It's kind of like getting a new pair of shoes. At first they're a bit uncomfortable, but over time your feet get broken into them and the shoes get more and more comfortable.

That's how I felt when I first stepped into my role as a missionary's wife two years ago. In the beginning, I didn't feel comfortable with telling all of our supporters and those who may be supporting us that yes, I'm a missionary... but I'm going to be a stay at home wife and mum. I had a hard time getting my mind around the thought that my job is just as important and support-worthy as my husband's job (also in a support role).

Image Credit: David Mayerhofer

Serving as a wife and mother has helped me learn that what I do is an important and valuable position. In some ways, it's a thankless job, but it doesn't go unnoticed by God! What has helped me in coming to this realisation is Proverbs 31. To me, the woman described in these verses is serving in a support role in her home. Now that's someone to strive to be! :)

She looks well to the ways of her household
    and does not eat the bread of idleness. Proverbs 31:27 (ESV)

Serving in my role as a wife and mother blesses my husband (Proverbs 31:28). Here are some of the ways I can do that:

• Keeping our house. This might be obvious, but for us this really blesses my husband. He likes it when I can take responsibility for the running of our home. Personally, I'm still growing into this job. :)
  
• Taking care of our son (and any future children we may have). This is another obvious one, but hey... it's important! Being able to raise our son and not have to send him away for someone else to care for is such a blessing! It's such a privilege to raise this little one God has given us in a biblical way.
  
• Doing partner ministry. Since getting married, I have taken on a fair amount of responsibility to contact and connect with our supporters and prayer partners. Usually I write most emails, postcards, connect through social media, etc. It takes the burden off of my husband so he can focus on his ministry more. He still helps me with those things, but I can serve him by doing most of it.
  

Those are some ways that you can serve in your support role as a wife and mother. In my next post, I'll share about how my family serves in a support role within our organisation, and how God can use us in that.

How do you serve in your ministry as a wife and mother? Do you have a role within your ministry or is your primary role being a wife and mother?

 

Chrysti is a missionary wife and mum serving in the north of England. You can find her blogging at Hedding Somewhere.

Dealing with Homesickness

Something strange happened a few weeks ago. Every Sunday, my husband and I listen to a sermon together online, sort of as 'extra food' for us. Usually, we listen to a sermon from our family of churches in England, my home church or our sending church. This particular week we listened to a couple from our sending church. It was a good sermon, but I'm not going to talk about that. What really caught me off guard was the feeling of homesickness I felt after listening to that sermon.

Homesickness? Where in the world did that come from? I've lived in England for over a year and a half and have not really struggled with homesickness. Until now.

I could speculate why I'm experiencing it now. Maybe it's because my life has changed dramatically in the past 4 months. Maybe it's because we now have a baby, and I long to be around family so our son can grow up with his grandparents, cousins, aunts and uncles. Maybe it's because my parents and in-laws have both come and gone recently. I really don't know, but all of a sudden I had this wave of missing the US.

 How do I deal with homesickness?

Maybe I haven't experienced it since moving to England because I've been intentional in trying to not to be homesick. I've learned a few things about preventing it since moving here as well as from when I was in college. There is, however, something about moving to a foreign country that trumps going away to college in terms of being homesick.

Keep busy.

I had to get involved in things right away. It really helped me to have things to look forward to every week. That could have been working at the church office, meeting ladies for coffee, bringing my husband lunch, or whatever other event that would come up. I found that if I didn't have something to look forward to, it was probably going to be a rough week!

Find a place that reminds you of home.

This was a tip that a friend of mine gave me a few months after moving to England. She told me that sometimes it helps if you can find a place that reminds you of home, like getting coffee at Starbucks or lunch at Subway. For me, it was grocery shopping at Aldi. :)

Find 'family.'

Honestly, it helps a lot that I'm married to Leon, who's lived in England longer than myself. He and Asher are my family now. At the same time, it's helpful to find a family we can be a part of. For example, it will be nice for Asher to have a 'substitute' granny, aunt, uncle, etc. when his real grandparents can't come visit (or we can't go visit them).

Thank God for Skype!

Modern technology has come a long way. Now we have the ability to see our friends and family back home on Skype video. It helped Leon and I as we grew our relationship early on, and it helps us now as we keep in touch with family and friends back home. My favourite part about Skype right now is introducing Asher to my friends and family by way of video (although it hasn't happened that often). I think my parents are glad they can watch Asher grow up through such an amazing technological invention.

Enjoy a cup of tea.

You know I have to say this since we live in England. :) There's just something about a cup of tea that makes my troubles seem to go away. And I can have my cup of tea while doing my next tip.

Look to God.

In reality, this should have been first on my list. As a Christian I should look to God in struggles such as homesickness. He will give me strength. It also helps to keep an eternal perspective—This earth isn't my home, and I'm longing for my home in heaven with Jesus.

So those are some things that I've found help me deal with homesickness while living in England. Have you struggled with homesickness? What have you done to deal with it? How do you help your children deal with homesickness?

Making a House Your Home

I remember when I first moved to England. I was intimidated. Now, I know that from the outside, living in England isn't that much different from living in the US. It didn't take very long to realise that it is indeed different. The houses are smaller and quite often very old. Most of the houses in this country have heating in each individual room, and the rooms all have doors to keep the heat in. Yeah. I think that's a bit different.


When I moved here, I had the task of making our house our home. It wasn't easy at first. My husband and I had just gotten married, so I felt like I was taking over his space. The other hurdle I faced was the cultural differences when it came to making our home.

Some friends of ours gave us the book, Dwelling: Living Fully from the Space You Call Home as a wedding gift. I found it helpful to read through the book as someone who was living cross-culturally because it gave me a new perspective on what "home" connotes.

Here are some things I've found helpful in making our house feel like home in England.


Don't change; adapt. For a long while, the cultural differences between England and the US are what held me back from really making our house a home. It's taken me awhile recognise that yes, there are cultural differences, but I don't necessarily have to follow the cultural norm in my own home. Instead, I've taken my own approach and put an American spin on the way I run my home. That way, I'm adapting to the culture and keeping some of my own American culture.

Our home is a refuge. My home is my own space... my own refuge from the rest of the world. When I've had a busy day, I look forward to coming home because I know I'll be safe there. I even have my own corner of the house where I can (sometimes) escape and be alone with the Lord. I know my husband feels comfortable in our home. I hope someday that my son will feel the same way when he comes home after a rough day.


Add a few things from the US. Don't get me wrong, I want to adapt to the English culture as much as possible. There are, however, a few things that I love to bring from the US that help our house feel more like home. Just about every time we have family come to visit, I ask them to bring me a big bag of cornmeal. I loooooove corn bread, and it makes me feel at home when I can have it with a big bowl of soup! The other things I loved bringing from the US are quilts. My mother has made us a few quilts, including ones I had from childhood. Having them in our house in England makes it feel more like home for some reason.

So those are some things that I've found helpful in making our house feel like home. What have you done to make your house feel like home?

Building Memorial Altars

I'm certain that visas are the bane of every missionary's existence. It was for me until I got permanent residency. Getting the visa is a story that shows God's provision and sovereignty in our lives. Oh, was God faithful.

In the Bible, Joshua built a memorial altar to remember how God helped Israel cross the Jordan River. Throughout our lives, we should build little memorial altars to remember what God has done in our lives. Remembering how He provided my visa, and later our permanent residence visas, is one of our memorial altars.

Each of you heft a stone to your shoulder, a stone for each of the tribes of the People of Israel, so you'll have something later to mark the occasion. When your children ask you, 'What are these stones to you?' you'll say, 'The flow of the Jordan was stopped in front of the Chest of the Covenant of God as it crossed the Jordan—stopped in its tracks. These stones are a permanent memorial for the People of Israel.' Joshua 4:5-7 (The Message)

It was quite an adventure to get my visa. We applied for it after we got married, and we were thrilled to get an email a few weeks later saying that it had been issued and it was going to be posted to... my previous address? This was not address we had asked them to send it to. OK, so it wasn't a big deal because we still had to go back to my previous residence before leaving for the UK. When we got the visa 2 days before we were to fly to the UK, we quickly discovered that the UK Consulate General had issued the wrong visa!

My husband rang the London visa office early in the morning on the day that we were to leave for the UK. It was decided that, while it's a valid visa, we still needed to get it fixed.

We were quickly off to Chicago after rushing around to finish our last-minute packing. We hired a car to drive to Chicago and get to the British Consulate General. Once we arrived, the security guard informed us that the office had just closed, that they don't take visa appointments directly, and they only help British citizens. By this time we were praying for a miracle! I cried... we stepped aside and prayed. The security guard decided he could contact someone he knew in the office who could pull a few strings. Before we knew it, we were in the elevator to 'lucky' floor 13, we got to speak with our entry clearance officer, and explained to him why the visa they had given me wouldn't work. After checking on some policies, the entry clearance officer decided that, yes it was the wrong visa and issued me a new one. Praise the Lord!!

Once we got back downstairs, we became more aware of God's hand in our situation. The security guard explained to us that if any of the other guards had been on duty, they wouldn’t have called up to pull strings under any circumstances. This particular security guard only worked on Wednesdays (when we were there), and after that week, he switched to nights. Wow! God definitely knew how this would all work out. Even the security guard commented on how God must have been looking out for us.

One of our prayers has been that others would be able to see God working in our lives… even those who don’t believe… and that prayer got answered this time. In a big way!

This is one of my memorial altars. What memorial altars are you building in your life?

Forget the Map

I like maps. I like them because they help me know where I'm going.

On a recent trip to London to visit a friend, we found ourselves driving to Brighton on the south coast. Before leaving, my husband, who is good at finding his way around, looked at a map to plan our route. Things went beautifully until we were ready to go back. There was a traffic jam on the Motorway. With quick thinking, my husband got off at the next junction to take the "back way." I don't think any of us knew where we were or what direction to go to get back to the hospitality house where we were staying. My husband decided to follow signs... in lieu of a map. I was fine with that until he decided to stop following those signs. How were we going to get back if our route kept changing? I was very frustrated because I had no idea how we were going to get home.

At the end of the day, we got back to where we were staying, but it wasn't the route we planned on taking.

How often do we get frustrated with God when He has a different route for us to get to our destination? "I know He has called me to do thus-and-such, and this is the way I'd like to go to get there" So we set off on our journey. Then God changes our route. We get frustrated, maybe even angry. I've been there. I cry out to God wondering how I'm going to do this thing He's called me to do when He's changed direction on me.

I like to know how I'm going to get to where God wants me. But God doesn't use maps... or at least He doesn't use the map I want Him to use.

As an example in my own life, I knew that God had called me to ministry work... I just had my own ideas for getting there until God had me meet my husband and move to England.

In a Skype call with some friends, my husband and I were telling them where we see ourselves in the future. We were looking for feedback to help us make a decision. She reminded us of this verse:

A man’s heart plans his way,
But the Lord directs his steps.  Proverbs 16:9 (NKJV)

It's a good reminder that it's okay to make plans, as long as I'm open to God changing them or changing the route to get there.

 

Do you like to know where you're going? How do you handle it when God changes your route?