Tuesday Topic: Helping kids move

Recently Ingrid said that she was "wondering if anyone has any reading or activities that would help children leave their home country and transition into another?"

I'm sorry I didn't post anything last week! It's a bit crazy around here. Even though we're physically safe, just living in a country that is in turmoil takes a lot out of me. You probably understand quite well. Please pray for Ukraine!

(If you have a “Tuesday Topic” question, please email it to me at fylliska@gmail.com. Provide your blog address if you would like to be linked to, or specify if you would like to remain anonymous. Thanks!)

Grieving with Our Countries

I don't know how many of you have seen this video by Save the Children circulating Facebook and Twitter this week. It shows what life would be like for British children if war came to the U.K. The purpose is to help Westerners identify with what is happening to children in Syria and other conflict zones.

The video struck a chord with me because I know so many adults in "our country", El Salvador, that lived through the trauma of war as children. I know that many of you are serving in countries that are currently conflict zones, or have been in recent times.

In El Salvador, everyone my age grew up during the civil war. They lived through terrifying home invasions, and the terror of having relatives kidnapped. They also remember seeing dead bodies on the side of the road, and hearing the roar of helicopters over their heads as they fled their homes.

My childhood was so different. I didn't have a care in the world and the concept of war was something relegated to an occasional evening news report. War never came to my doorstep.

But now here I am in a country that still lives with the trauma and fear of over a decade of civil war. The legacy echoes down to the many issues that we deal with in our street ministry. One generation affects the next as wounds continue to bleed, and scars have not yet healed.

And I grieve with my country. As you grieve with yours.

When we are called somewhere as a missionary, we enter into the story of a people that we may have never even known before. Their dreams become our dreams, and we take on their pain as we work so desperately to bring some relief for it. We enter into the grieving process with them when their losses become ours, and we celebrate with them in their moments of joy.

We find ourselves awake long hours into the night crying out on behalf of the people we love, and we waver in our faith when we don't understand what God is doing. We strive, and we fail, and we persevere, and we press on to see God's Kingdom come in some small way in these places that are now part of who we are.

And God hears our cries.

He uses us, and He grows us, and we have the privilege and the joy and the seemingly impossible task of being the ones He chooses. And we thank Him, and and we ask Him why, and we trust Him to take care of our countries.

Today I am in prayer for my country, El Salvador, as we go into an election weekend. A lot is at stake and emotions are high. And I pray for your countries around the world, and for your hearts as they are breaking.

How can we be praying for each other and the countries we serve this week? 

Like a nursing mother...

"But we were gentle among you, like a nursing mother taking care of her own children.  So, being affectionately desirous of you, we were ready to share with you not only the gospel of God but also our own selves, because you had become very dear to us."- 1 Thessalonians 2:7-8

Perhaps it is the emotions of having a newly weaned baby and having weaned earlier than I had wished due to my own body’s inability to produce the milk he needed, but these verses have been strongly on my heart for the past several weeks.

It has been a long and hard year here, and a discouraging one in many ways, and a year where I’ve vividly seen and felt the brokenness and sin that has consumed this country where I live. As I’ve meditated on this verse, God has renewed that tender love for the people here that He loves and has created. His heart is affectionately desirous of them, and though I feel like I’ve felt the aggression and harshness of those around me, God has refreshed an affectionate desire that they would know our loving God who can change even this broken place that has a way of urging everyone toward bitterness. My heart breaks for these people. 

The part of this passage that has struck me in a new and profound way is the part that says that “we were ready to share with you not only the gospel of God, but also our own selves, because you had become very dear to us.” As I’ve nursed and cared for our fourth child, my sweet baby Jude, I have felt what it feels like to literally give myself. In the midst of this year full of trials, illness, discouragement, a traveling husband, and many other challenges, I’ve had this sweet baby boy who needs me, literally needs my own body, in order to be nourished. First, he grew within me receiving from me every nutrient that God would use to knit his little body together, and then even once he was outside he was nourished for 10 months from food that my own body made for him. Nursing has sometimes been very easy for me, with hardly a thought that I’d need to do a thing to help make this nourishing food, but this time around, literally from day one I’ve had to work so hard to sleep enough, eat enough, take the right vitamins, drink enough water, drink special teas, sit down often enough even in the midst of busy daily life to let my baby boy nurse to try to keep the supply of food coming, and so on. I have been constantly aware that I am giving myself to him, and yet I so desire his well-being that I want to do all that I can and give all that I can to him. 

As I think of this hard but lovingly desirous experience of nursing, I am encouraged again with a vision for what I want my life of ministry to be. God gives us the love and desire for the hearts and souls of people, and he calls us to give of ourselves sacrificially and personally out of that love. I desire to think of my life in ministry in this personal nursing-mother sort of a way rather than with the sometimes cold-sounding name called occupational ministry. I pray that God will make me, and you too, so affectionately desirous of the people that we serve that we will lovingly, joyfully, and willingly give of our own selves for their spiritual well-being.

How is your heart toward the people that you are ministering to right now? Is this a season where affectionate desire comes freely and easily, or perhaps are you in a season where you’ve been hurt by those that you are ministering to and struggle with that desire? Let’s pray for one another in this as self-sacrifice can be so very hard and desirous affection is something that I believe at times can only come from the Lord. 

Tuesday Topic: Less time for ministry?

From Rebecca: Are there any moms on the mission field struggling with being stay home moms and housekeepers most of the time? Any recommendations on how to deal with this situation?

This is a good question, and it reminded me of this older article: Called Overseas to Cook and Clean? Are there any others on this topic from the archives that we should revisit?

(If you have a “Tuesday Topic” question, please email it to me at fylliska@gmail.com. Provide your blog address if you would like to be linked to, or specify if you would like to remain anonymous. Thanks!)

Ever seen a baby lizard dressed in Polly Pocket clothing?

I have. I wish I had a picture… But I don’t. All I have is the memory.

And that memory often gets me thinking about this fact.

Sometimes, we missionary types take ourselves a little too seriously. We want to

• be effective,
• impact lives,
• not just do what we do well but very well – if not perfectly,
• look good while doing it,
• maybe garner a few more ministry partners, and
• have at least a few great stories to share.

We sometimes forget we’re just ordinary folks serving an extraordinary God, often in not-your-run-of-the-mill locations.

My son is off for his freshman year of college. One of the things that so impressed us about the university he is attending was their rather extensive program and system of support in place to help international students and TCKs transition to this new phase of life. During his most recent trip home, I was asking him about his friends, and in particular, if he spent much time hanging out with his fellow TCK-types. His comment went something along the lines of, “Yeah, I do hang out with them sometimes. But sometimes I get tired of being part of a group of people that thinks they are more special and unique than everyone else. Sometimes, I think they’d be more fun if they’d just get over it.”

Ouch!

But back to my lizard story…

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I don't just write for Missionary Mom's Companion... and today I've ended up scheduled to post both places on the same day! So...

Pop on over to a life overseas: the missions conversation... to read the rest

of this lizard story as well as my thoughts about ordinary missionaries and tcks.

I'd love for you to jump on in, join the conversation - here or there, wherever you are most comfortable; I so appreciate your input!

Overseas Friendly Growth Chart

I seem to be in a season of creating here.  I don't know if it's because my husband had a week off at the end of our summer camp season (yes, it's summer here in Costa Rica.  No, don't try to figure it out.  Yes, we are north of the equator, but they still call this time of year summer.)  I digress.

Ok.  So back to the Overseas Friendly DIY stuff...

So my husband has a thing for recording the boys heights on the wall.  Which works wonderfully if we were to stay in the same house from now until the baby is in college.  But, being that we are kind of global nomads, the likelihood of that happening is virtually 0.

So.  One day I realized I could make a fabric one!  What?!  We have a fabric advent calendar that is so easy to pack, and as we all know, we can always use a bit more padding in those suitcases.  And unless you are making one of these out of denim it shouldn't add too much to the overall weight. Really, denim would just be like another pair of jeans.

Ok, so here's how we did it.  I say we because I am mathematically challenged and needed my husband to help with the measuring.  I know. Lame.  Anyway.

Noah (my husband) decided we should make it 6 foot 5 inches tall.  Yes, our boys could grow that tall.  Vamos a ver.  He also decided that it doesn't need to reach the ground, just down to about 37 inches.  Yep, this means that the baby won't be measured any time soon, but that's fine too.  Do what you want.

I found a piece of cream muslin in my stash and cut it in half.  Then I found some other brown leafy fabric and sewed it with the right sides facing each other, you know like making a pillow case.  The brown fabric was wider than the muslin which is what I wanted.  I liked the idea of having the leafy pattern on the front side too.  Then I top stitch it down the side with the brown fabric.

Next, I marked the inches and half inches.  With some cream cotton yarn I had, I made the inch marks.  I didn't do that as neatly as I was hoping, but hey, this ain't rocket science.  I had a brown pen and used it to add the inches in and to mark the big boys heights from this last year.  Goodness they have grown!!

And now we can have those heights for posterity.  And it's portable!

Does your family record the kids' heights?  What other things do you do to keep memories of childhood?

Tuesday Topic: Visas

This is just out of curiosity, but it reflects what my own family is right in the midst of now: What is the document situation like in your country? Can you briefly explain what it takes for you to live there legally? (I didn't have a question for you last week, because we were traveling to work on... residency documents.)

(If you have a “Tuesday Topic” question, please email it to me at fylliska@gmail.com. Provide your blog address if you would like to be linked to, or specify if you would like to remain anonymous. Thanks!)