Quinn wasn't born here in Costa Rica. We say he's "casi Tico" (almost Costa Rican) but I was too chicken to have him here. You think I am joking. Check out our middle son's birth story. We just felt like it was a wiser decision for our family to have him near family. So that's what we did. We left Costa Rica when I was somewhere around 34 weeks (still able to fly internationally. The ticket counter guy really thought I shouldn't be flying!) We moved back when Quinn was just 3 months old. Really, we were in the States long enough to have him and get his passport.
I did most of my prenatal care here while we were in language school. We saw a general practitioner
here who works with language school students. He speaks perfect English and knows both the North American practices and Tico practices. He works with a lot of expats, so he was able to help maneuver the coming and going with the records and all. When we were in Michigan for Christmas I saw the OB that I had when I was pregnant with our oldest. That was the practice that delivered Quinn when we got back stateside.
So while I didn't personally have a baby overseas, I know plenty of women who did and had great experiences. Sure, there were differences, some good, some bad, but all lived to tell the tale. And isn't' that a funny thing about us women? We love a good birth story! I was once in a conversation with a North American, and Costa Rican and a Korean in which we were all exchanging birth stories. It's just universal.
So, what's your overseas pregnancy or birth story?
Love this post, Liz! I'm interested in hearing other's experiences with having babies overseas. :)
ReplyDeleteI had our son in the UK. I was kind of surprised how many people asked me if I would go back to the US to have him... but we have socialised health care here, so it was cheaper to have all my antenatal (prenatal) care here. Plus, I *love* the midwife care under the NHS! I pretty much didn't see a doctor at all during my pregnancy until I had complications after delivery. They even gave me the option to have a home birth. That's just the way they do things here. I really hope we can have more babies in the UK. :)
Ok, I am so interested in this because of that show, "Call the Midwife" LOVE it! And with our second I had a midwife in rural Michigan...we were an hour from the nearest hospital. I still delivered in the hospital (it was actually our second son, so it was good I was in hospital). Glad you had such a good experience Chrysti!
DeleteThat's one of my favourite shows!!
DeleteI read your birth story for your 2nd. I bet you were glad you were in hospital. I actually had to be transferred to hospital after our son was born. It was a good thing it was only 10 minutes away (by ambulance).
Liz! I LOVE the picture of you and your baby in the wrap. So cute. Funny thing: I was going to say, "I didn't have my babies overseas either." Then I remembered that BOTH of my babies were born in El Salvador. Yep, good ol' Centro Ginecologico. I guess that's overseas for a Texas girl, but it didn't seem like it since my husband is Salvadoran and I lived there 5 years.
ReplyDeleteMy first experience was not so great; the doctor was very old fashioned and made me lie down the whole time. Didn't pay any mind when I started yelling for the epidural. I had no epidural the second time either, but the experience was wonderful. I went to a different doctor, with more modern ideas, little pain, just 3 hours of labor at the hospital! But it was hard to get my baby girl out of the hospital with no earrings. The nurses asked 20 times, "Where are her earrings. We'll pierce her ears now before you leave."
I've heard that about the earrings! So funny! And I think it hilarious that you don't consider El Salvador overseas :) But I understand why :)
DeleteOur daughter was born here in Costa Rica and the hospital staff was pretty confused by us not having earrings for her either... But that was just one cultural thing I couldn't do!
DeleteI totally would have had her ears pierced, but her SALVADORAN FATHER wouldn't allow it! Go figure!!!
DeleteThat is so funny about the earrings being offered at the hospital! Wow! I love learning these little cultural uniquenesses.
DeleteThat too funny Olive! I have thought if we did have a girl I would pierce her ears right away as a nod to the culture. Here I've heard that close family friends bring the earrings to the hospital as a way of showing that girls are just as cherished here as boys.
DeleteI always love this topic! Birth stories, no matter where, are always so interesting to me. =)
ReplyDeleteLiz, I love your pictures too! It seems like you have a really fun family!
I had two of our four here in Russia. The neat thing for us is that Russia's first private birthing hospital geared toward the Russian middle class was built here in St. Petersburg about 7 years ago. Because of our insurance, we were able to go this route. It was so great! The style of care in many ways is still very Russian, but the doctors are all nice and the facilities are more comfortable than if I had had my babies in the state hospital.
I actually had better birth experiences here than my two in the US. There is much more after care for the mother here in Russia. Also, they pretty much left me and my babies alone for the first day after delivery, apart from a couple of quick checks to make sure they were doing alright. I was woken up all night long in the hospital in the US, and it really seemed unnecessary and exhausting. I loved the freedom to just be with my babies and the fact that the doctors didn't make me feel like this was a scary period of time where things would likely go wrong. They observed, and were available for questions whenever or to intervene if there was a problem, but the main focus for the whole first day, and even the days after (the hospital stay is about 4 days) was on bonding and recovering and getting going with breastfeeding. It felt so much more natural and healthy and far less clinical. To this day, the birth of our third child was one of the most purely joyful and stress-free times I've ever experienced (Don't get me wrong, I was just as overjoyed at the birth of the other 3, but I just mean that this joy was not interrupted by medical staff and other stresses... with my 4th who was born here, I had a harder recovery physically).
One of the greatest joys of having our babies overseas was the fact that we got to go straight to our own home afterward. It was so special to be able to make this transition apart from other major transitions. We have praised God so many times for the blessing of having had this option and allowing us to have such a wonderful experience giving birth in our host country. It was such a gift!
How lovely that you had such a sweet experience in Russia!! One thing I've hear, and maybe Sarah P can comment on, is that here in Costa Rica, you get about 24 hours in the hospital. I always liked my time in the hospital, maybe because I had so much to recover from!
DeleteYes, it's true... here you get 24 hours after the baby's birth to be in the hospital. But, our daughter came a month early, and ended up needing to be in the NICU for 5 days, and they let me stay in my room that whole time. It was very nice to have that extra time to recover from a really difficult birth!
DeleteLeila Evangeline was born March 5 here in Ghana. We've been here for more than 2 years. So we knew enough to know we were in a whole new cultural adventure when we chose to stay for her birth.
ReplyDeleteShe was a dry season baby. We have no AC. Our electricity was on load sharing ( off for 12hrs, on for 24) & we have to conserve water due to the season.
I can honestly say God's grace got me through. It wasn't always pretty. I was not always a picture of the glowing (only sweaty) blessed-to-be pregnant-with-number-4 momma that I wanted to be.
Leila was born a week early into the hands of Ghanaian midwives & (given a casual look over) by a German OBGYN. The practice sees many ethnicities. They were skeptical, but okay with my husband being ever present. (He won them over. :) ) It was a quieter experience than any of my deliveries in the States. We savored so many moments I missed before.
The trade off was having to bring every blessed supply that was needed for postpartum care. Someday I'll tell my little girl her first diaper was a sanitary pad! ( Don't ask why the tiny diapers didn't come along in the bag. I'd like to blame my 4yo daughter!) Having to ask for the hot water to be turned on so I could shower, bringing in all our food & water & having the ants eat more of it than we did & having the nurses insist on rubbing her all over with oil that gave her a ridiculous rash.
That was 4 months ago. She is a delight to every one we meet. She is visible sign to these people that we value them. We stayed for a birth & that means something to them. Baby Abenah (her Twi day of the week name) is a Ghana-baby. She smiles (usually) for each one who pinches her cheeks & laughs into her face.
We may leave Ghana before she is old enough to remember it. But her birth certificate will remind her &, we pray, place a special call on her life.
God is faithful!
Oh Sara! How sweet! You touch on a point that I struggled with, the idea of showing our friends and those we meet that we trust this country with our children. That was something I needed to leave in God's hands because of what was best for our family. So glad you got to do it!
DeleteYes, the trust idea is right on. But in this culture a woman will go spend up to 3 months (!) at her mother's house after the birth. It gives her a break from cooking, washing & carrying water. It's actually not a great idea...breaking up the family like that. Some of the young pastors we work with are asking their MIL's to come to their home after the birth. Want to invite your MIL when you live in one room? :) Anyway, this tradition helps them understand how hard it is for me to be away from my family during pregnancy/birth. Another factor in our staying in Ghana to have Leila was that we are in our last year here. We are tentatively planning on returning to the States next year so my husband can continue his education. It just made sense to stay. And it made sense for you to go.
DeleteBy the way, I've enjoyed your blog, seeing your little guy in a Moby wrap(I think) & would love to taste some of those tamales. I seriously showed that post to my husband and respectfully requested he consider a move to Central America. :)
Yeah, that sounds like a tradition with a lot of implications on family life! Yikes!! And yep, that's a moby. And those Tamales..ha!! Yeah, spent all day slaving over them to make them in the most traditional way and NO ONE in my family likes them! What?!!? Hahah...oh well...
Deletein my crew of 8, 5 were born in michigan, 1 in quebec during our language study time and 2 in niamey, niger. in niamey, the midwives are the primary caregivers, you are expected to labor silently through all stages (thankful that is my natural way to labor, anyways) and the nurses will remind you if you don't and everything is very laid back and casual. when we were investigating, i asked, out of curiosity, what they did for pain medications. the midwife told me i could bring my own tylenol. :-)
ReplyDeletei much prefered my deliveries here in niger to my ones in the states. i was usually home within 12-15 hours after baby's arrival and there was no "protocol" to follow. in fact, the midwife was making tea when our 7th decided to arrive so hubby delivered her while the midwife told him what to do as she was getting her gloves and gown on.
our last was born in michigan - when i started presenting some complicating factors, we (as in hubby and doctors) decided they'd rather me be in the states wishing i was in niger than in niger needing to be somewhere with the capacity to care for preemies.
my canadian labor was my longest and most difficult (#4) - 5 days. thankful i had an old school dr who didn't like c-sections, however. he let the labor continue because both baby and i were tolerating it... and i actually forgot how to speak english during the delivery. ;-)
Richelle, you are some kinda rock star!!! I stand in awe of your amazingness! :)
DeleteI love this topic, too! All four of ours have been born in Russia or Ukraine, and it's been wonderful. Hard at times, but wonderful. Really, this culture is all I know for pregnancy, birth, and baby care. One of the biggest leaps forward in understanding Russian language and culture was when I took a weekly class during my first pregnancy.
ReplyDeleteI love birth stories! I had both of my sons overseas in South Korea. At first I thought I would follow normal Korean practices, until I saw what they were. Then I hired a doula and found a birth center. I had two amazing, completely natural, drug-free water births. I live an hour away from the birth center though, so driving to Seoul in transition was not fun. We almost had our 2nd on the side of the highway, but I refused to let my husband stop!
ReplyDeleteLiving overseas helped me find my comfort zone with birth though. Had I been in my hometown, I would've followed anything my obgyn would tell me. I would never have wanted the births that I had. And I'm certain I wouldn't have fallen in love with the birth world.
Koreans love babies and usually stay inside for 3 months. We try to stay warm but there's no way I could sit at home for 3 months. We just accept the critics and move on. Finding maternity and post-pardum clothes are the hardest here though!