Ok. Let's talk school.
Sigh. This is such a huge point of confusion in our house right now. Let me give you a bit of background.
Ok. We have a 6 year old, a 4 year old and a 10 month old. During language school our two oldest were in the preschool (in Spanish) on the same campus as us. The 10 month old was in my belly, absorbing all the Spanish and sucking all the life force out of me that he could.
Now that we are working in our ministry, we face all sorts of issues with school. We decided to home school this year because we didn't know what any of our options would be. And, just to complicate things a bit more, we decided to do this homeschooling on the Costa Rican school calendar, from February to December.
Ok...so now, we are realizing that the big piece of this puzzle we are missing is the Spanish. Since we are a English speaking family, and since the boys and I are home most days, we just aren't getting the Spanish interaction we should. So now comes the really confusing part, all the options.
Do we:
A) Continue homeschooling on the Tico schedule and look for other Spanish options?
B) Continue homeschooling on an American schedule and look for other Spanish options?
C) Send them to the local public school 300 meters from our house, that's all in Spanish and who knows what the quality of the education is?
D) Send them to a bilingual private school on a Tico schedule?
E) Send them to a bilingual private school on an American schedule?
F) Buy a second car to take them to the private school?
G) Buy a motor scooter for my husband to drive to work so I can have the car to take them to a private school?
H) Figure out the private busing system here and put my sweet baby faced 6 year old on a bus with strangers?
I) Bury our heads in the sand and pretend they don't need to go to school at all?
I know we are blessed by having options, but honestly, right now, I sorta wish we didn't, so that the decision would just be made for us. But as I have talked to other friends around the globe, I realize we're not the only ones struggling with this decision.
I am trying to remember that God has called the whole family here. So, that means our boys need to be here for God to grow them into the men He wants them to be. And, whatever choice we make doesn't have to be forever. Every day I pray for wisdom from the One who promises that if we ask for it, He'll give it to us. But we still don't know what we are suppose to do. So we keep waiting and praying.
Goodness, I feel like a I do a whole lot more asking questions here than being helpful. But maybe in the process of me asking the question to all of you, you will be able to help not only me, but someone else. At least that's what I am going to tell myself, hehehe.
So, what do you do for schooling? What led you to make that choice? And what in the world should we do? Ha!
Hi, Liz... my kids are around the same ages as yours, and we are homeschooling. I don't know if this will help you at all, but we were able to find a private, Spanish-speaking school here in Quito (thanks to another homeschooling missionary family) that is allowing us to send our 7-year old part-time. He attends 3 full days a week and does "English school" with me here at home on the other 2 days. We pay a reduced rate, too. The director of the school studied in Canada, knows about homeschooling, and is supportive of it. We are sending him primarily so he can learn Spanish, but there are other benefits too, like making friends, being able to do sports (like swimming and Tae Kwando). I'm not sure how long we will continue, at least through next year so he can really get the language down. We are already seeing such progress, after only 2 months. We will probably try something similar with our 4-year old starting next school year. I never thought we would find an Ecuadorian school that would be willing to let us send our kids part-time, but then this opportunity just dropped in our laps. So, maybe you can ask around and see if there are schools willing to work with you on this. And also, I loved what you said about no choice being forever. I tell people all the time that we are homeschooling FOR NOW because we think that is the right choice for our kids and our family situation, but we are open to revisiting that decision in the future.
ReplyDeleteWhat a great set up!! We talked with the public school just 300 meters from us about the same thing and they said no. Otherwise, that's what we would have done.
DeleteAh man, I WISH we could find a set up like that as well! That sounds ideal. But like you all said, whatever we decide is not permanent. It can change from year to year as our children need it. Even so, I so want to provide them with some sort of stability in this not so stable missionary life. :)
DeleteI am with you Kelsey! I don't want every year to be something different. I'd love it if when we are here, they know what school they go to, and when we are in the states, this is where they go...hummm...Lord, give us wisdom!
DeleteWow -- this couldn't be a more timely post! I literally just minutes ago struggled through some tears and feelings of being very overwhelmed by this exact topic! Our oldest is five and would start kindergarten this fall in the States. We have had him in a private, bilingual preschool (following the Tico schedule) for the past year and a half. We chose the school because he really needed to start learning more Spanish than he was learning from me at home (and just through daily life here). I know that for our kids to really feel at home here and to be able to participate in the life of our church family here, they need to know Spanish. The school has been a good experience, but he is not learning Spanish as easily as we expected since it is a bilingual school... and I am constantly researching homeschooling... and am realizing that I will probably end up supplementing at home even if we did send him to any school here. One very small decision I have made is that IF we homeschool in the future, we will follow the Tico schedule so that he has the same schedule as neighbors and church friends, has Costa Rican holidays off, etc.
ReplyDeleteSO, I have no answers for you... just some reassurance that you are not alone! There is another mama in Costa Rica struggling through exactly the same thing! (maybe we should meet in person someday?)
Yes!! We should meet in person!! I think you live over by Atenas right? We're in San Rafael de Heredia...we really should figure something out! My parents are here for a few weeks, but after that, my schedule is wide open. Let's chat!
DeleteYes, we live near Atenas centro. It would be fun to meet you!
DeleteAlright! Maybe the middle of May? drop me a line at nlkamper at gmail dot com :)
DeleteThis is kind of funny. Your questions are almost exactly the same as what I already have scheduled for Tuesday! So, we can talk about it now and more then. :-)
ReplyDeleteI like your last option of what to do. Hah!
I'll pray for those of you who are struggling with these decisions now. God will give you the wisdom you need for your family and your situation and each individual child.
ha! Oh dear...sorry to steal your post Phyllis! :) But yes, it will be good to chat about it again next week.
DeleteThe question on what is the best situation for our kids/family is one we all deal with! No, you are not alone in this! But I think what you said about it not having to be a forever decision is key. Our oldest son is now in 8th grade but has been in 6 different schools since kindergarten - not including a 5 month homeschool stint during a transitional period in our lives! And I'm grateful to say, by the grace of God, he is very well adjusted in all areas of his life. I don't know that I would have chosen for him to be moved around that much, but the Lord knew that was going to happen, and He has protected our oldest from a lot of "baggage" that could have come with all that. :) We have to trust Him with our children and provide a safe, secure, and God-fearing home for them. I am hoping, though, that my 2 younger boys won't have to move around quite as much as their big brother! :) Right now we have all 3 in a Christian, bilingual school that is on the US schedule, and we are very satisfied with it. Their Spanish has improved by leaps and bounds since starting 2 1/2 years ago. But yes, it is definitely a sacrifice financially....
ReplyDeleteRemember James 1:5 - that He will give wisdom to anyone who asks - without reproach! Praise God for that! I wholeheartedly agree with you - giving them every opportunity to learn Spanish is crucial, because the Lord has called you to Costa Rica as a family. I will definitely be praying for you and Noah...
Thanks Jennifer!! Really appreciate it! Part of the problem with any school option other than home school is at this point we are a one vehicle family and Noah needs that vehicle every day to get to and from work...so we're praying about options :)
DeleteWe went through the same struggle when we moved to El Salvador. Our oldest was in Pre-K at the time. We ultimately chose E and F. Where we live there are several American schedule/private schools so that was a good option for us. We did a ton of research too and found that the public school system is lacking, as well as many private bi-lingual schools. We chose an international school that is small, and offers a discount to missionaries. We made the choice because we want our kids to have a strong academic base in both English and Spanish. They are definitely getting both...reading and writing in Spanish, as well as learning in English and getting all the playground interaction. Their school is about half national/half international so they don't "stand out" as the only foreigners. They also get "extras" like dance class and swimming lessons included in the school curriculum which is nice. Those are all pros. I will give you the "cons" of our set up. The academics are rigorous which is a pro, but prepare youself that kids begin writing in cursive at age 4 and by 5 have spelling tests and are expected to learn to read in both languages. Also, they will have a lot of homework, tests, etc. I think Spanish-speaking countries are all pretty notorious for having super strict/structured Spanish progams. Another potential issue is that all students are expected to fit into a box...that is they all have the same hand-writing, learn the same material at the same rate, etc. For my son this isn't a problem, for my daughter it's been tough. The school finally skipped her a grade but she is definitely not the structured/fit in a box type so I get a lot of correspondence from the school:). Another potential con is that your kids could end up in school with some super rich kids which may exclude them. That's why we went with a smaller international school with students from a variety of backgrounds to try to get away from some of that culture. I hope this helps??? I'm sure things are somewhat different in CR, but I think across the board international schools are fairly similar. Another pro is that our kids are on vacation when most of the volunteers come to work with us so they get to be more involved. If you want to email me to ask more questions, I will be glad to get into even more detail with you! Good luck!
ReplyDeleteGood thoughts Danielle! Thanks!
DeleteOh, I did want to ask what is the importance of which schedule you're on? Why would that matter much?
ReplyDeleteAnd if you do want to homeschool, I could come up with some suggestions about how to do that without sacrificing on the bilingual front. Being bilingual is VERY important for our family.
For us it matters for several reasons...1. My husbands busiest times are during the school breaks here (Jan and July) Do we ant our kids' breaks to fall when he can't possibly get away from work? That would mean no vacations as a family 2. Because the Tico school year starts in Feb. The way our ministry works is we will be taking furloughs either from Feb to June or August to Decemeber. So, in two years when we head back for the first time, their schedule will be off from what the kids around us will be. If we were to put them in public school stateside, they would be 6 months behind where they should be.
DeleteAnd yes, I am curious, how you are doing the bilingual thing.
We put our kids in Russian public preschool and kindergarten to help them get the basic language and interaction. When they started first grade, we started homeschooling. This helped us to feel comfortable with what they were being taught as well. In kindergarten they were just learning numbers, letters, and the basics, and the biggest life lessons that were being learned in school were simply things like sharing and getting along. After kindergarten, though, we felt like they should be at home and away from the worldly influences, philosophy, and teaching day in/day out. This worked well for us, our children are fluent in Russian, yet they have the benefit of a Christian American education.
ReplyDeleteThis is encouraging, Jolene! This is what we have been doing so far (our oldest is in his last year of preschool this year). What has surprised us, though, is that language learning has been much more difficult and slower for him than we expected. Thanks for sharing your experience!
Deletewow, so much to think about. We work at the school our kids (11, 6 and 4) go to (we're in East Africa)so didn't have much choice ;0) but now we're here I'm glad it's the school they're at, primarily because it's Christian. It's an international English-speaking school, though the majority of students are nationals. the kids have French lessons several times a week and we also do extra at home though I'd also be interested to know how Phyllis does the bi-lingual thing! The main language spoken here though is a local one and we're all learning that together. The alternatives were totally French-speaking (which would have worked for the youngest 2 but the 11 year old would have found it tough),and definitely not Christian, in fact almost anti. I admit I do a fair amount of home-ed with them all too, as until last year they'd all been educated in the UK and I want them to continue to be educated to that high standard. I kind of aim to 'fill in the gaps' (many of which are the result of schools here simply not having western facilites eg. labs,art,tech). It's hard work and takes more time and energy than I'd anticipated but it's ok. I've loved reading about everyone else's experiences and feel less alone in this missionary-kid-education-scenario so many of us seem to wrestle with :0)
ReplyDeleteisn't it nice to know we're not doing this alone? Somehow, while it doesn't change the hardness, it just makes it a bit more bearable :)
DeleteWe have tutors (we have two since we have five kids) coming every day now for two hours. It is really going well, and I will soon be using a tutor as well during that same time frame. Having the language lessons fit into our time frame and not having to go anywhere is such a blessing. Knowing who is teaching the kids and how they (both the kids and the teachers) are progressing is also such a benefit. We won't do this schedule forever, but it is really nice to give us a jumpstart on language. Hope you can make a decision you feel good about! It really is a tough one!
ReplyDeletesomeone just mentioned this idea to me...interesting to add to the mix :) Thanks Casey!
Deletewe've done just about any and all of the school options ... except boarding school and that is because we've never had to consider that option (although first child heads off to a college dorm this August... that doesn't quite count).
ReplyDeletewouldn't it be easier if this was a black and white sorta thing?
but it isn't. even within one family, what works best for one child doesn't for another and then you somehow have to weigh all of that into the realities of family life, transportation and financial issues, etc., etc., etc.
our kids have been home schooled, in local language (french) private schools (we haven't considered the public schools an option because teachers are on strike and school is canceled more than it is in session), and expat/international english language school. our kids have benefited from consistency, but that also hasn't stopped us from making a change when warranted.
there are pros and cons to each possibility. and i totally get that we want to make the very best choices for our kids. so we get the facts, pray a ton, make decisions and then run with them. sometimes they work beautifully, sometimes we can make them work and other times we realize that we need to make a change... at the end of the school year... or NOW! when i stopped looking at needing to change as a failure on my part and started seeing it as God continually giving me more and more insight into my children and their needs, a huge burden was lifted off my shoulders.
i've also had to be careful that i haven't grafted my dreams onto my kids via their education - especially with the language issue. my 5 oldest are all very comfortable in french. the next two both have some significant learning issues - one has an articulation disorder and the other is being tested for an auditory processing disorder. the older one of those two started in french and he understands much of what he hears and can communicate well enough to feel comfortable playing with buddies. but once we switched him into an english environment, his specific disability issues started to improve significantly.
were those first years in french academically the very best choice for him? quite possibly not. do i regret them? not at all... and neither does he. am i sad that he's not going to have the benefit of a second language the way his older siblings do? absolutely... but i'm a lot sadder about it than he is; for him, that 2nd language was simply a means to an end - street soccer fun. for me, i had to let go of an educational dream.
it is late, so i hope all that rambling makes some sense to someone.
Thank you Richelle! You always have such keen insight and since you've got some years at doing this kid thing, I really appreciate it! I liked this line "when i stopped looking at needing to change as a failure on my part and started seeing it as God continually giving me more and more insight into my children and their needs, a huge burden was lifted off my shoulders." Wow!! So so good! and then the thought about letting go of an educational dream. Good stuff!!
DeleteThanks lady!!
Bless your heart, Liz, you've got a lot to think about. We put our kids in Turkish kindergarten to help them with language, and we home schooled after that. (And I ask myself every year: did we do the right thing??)
ReplyDeleteIf you continue homeschooling, I would stay relaxed, on a schedule of finishing by noon, if your baby allows that! :-) Early elementary kids can't pay attention long anyway and don't need much school since life is a learning experience anyway. That might free you up to do things with neighbors or tico friends once or twice a week in the afternoons. (It's exhausting. I know.)
Also, I would be aware that sometimes we have very high expectations on our kids. I thought my kids would learn Turkish well quickly because, after all, aren't kids supposed to learn more easily? When my husband shared that it took him a whole year of sitting in a 6th grade classroom in San Francisco--he's Salvadoran--before he could speak English, my eyes were opened. Turkish is more difficult to learn than Spanish, and my kids learned over the course of 4-5 years, with constant contact with Turks in the afternoons. While we homeschool, we always enroll them in classes or activities in the community (taekwondo, skating, etc.) Littles often don't speak a foreign language too well because they're not so clear in their own language either!!! ;-)
As a brand mew missionary mom (I was overseas as a single, but not since marrying and having my now 6 and 8 year old babes) I just had to thank you for this phrase:
ReplyDeleteI am trying to remember that God has called the whole family here. So, that means our boys need to be here for God to grow them into the men He wants them to be.
I. NEEDED. THAT. The worry is there, the concern that my happy, loving, well adjusted children will struggle with this move. But God is calling them as well as us and I needed to be reminded. Thanks.
oh good! Glad something of my ramblings was helpful for you! And yes, He has called the whole family! Praying for you!
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